Mirror Verse vs Matt and Mello
by xXduchessXx
Summary: Mirror-verse meets Matt and Mello! Featuring florid green carpet, cross-dressing Matt and peppermint candles! Credit to iflip4dolphins for the idea!


**Mirror-Verse vs. Matt and Mello**

_**Summary: **_Mirror-verse meets Matt and Mello! Featuring florid green carpet, cross-dressing Matt and peppermint candles! Credit to iflip4dolphins for the idea!

_**Disclaimer:**_ Don't own.

_**A/N:**___This one… I don't even know where this one came from. Lighting from above I suppose.

OoOoOoOo

"Where… are…we."

Matt looked around helplessly at the room. The couch was green with horrid little pink flowers on it and was covered in plastic. The carpet was a bright florid green that clashed with everything including the teal tea table. The walls... Ugh. God save him from kitten paintings. Matt could have sworn that one moved.

"Honestly? I have no idea. But this might have something to do with you and Near working on that mirror universe machine. And that chocolate bar you dropped into it while I was creating the control panel. That, and I'm pretty sure that Near was holding a remote with a big red button and smiling evilly. Which is never good." Mello glared around at the room that was burning his eyes. Actually that might be the scented candle. He _hated_ peppermint.

"If this is a mirror universe, then where the hell are we in it? I don't care what universe we're in I would _never _put this stuff in my basement."

"Actually, considering that in theory, you mirror self is your complete opposite, I would have to guess that this is our basement. Or your basement." Matt wandered thoughtfully over to the candle and blew it out, Mello did hate peppermint. Just at that moment, there were footsteps on the stairs. Not firm stomps like Mello's or quick patters like Matt's, but demure, barely there whispers along the carpet. The pair waited with baited breath for the newcomer.

Around the corner, descending the last step, came the girliest boy either of them had ever seen. He (there was no real chest, which was the only reason they didn't immediately assume it was female) was wearing a horrid shirt that had nearly the same pattern as the couch, pants the same color as the carpet, and had long blond hair that reached almost to the middle of his back, held up loosely by a hair tie so that his ears and the sides of his smooth face were covered. The shirt was falling off of one shoulder and he had a phone in one hand and a cup of green tea in the other. Seeing that he had visitors, Girly Boy jumped in fright and spilled lukewarm tea all over himself and the carpet.

"Who the fuck 're you? And what the hell did you do to the room?" Mello asked rudely, while Matt looked on in horrified fascination. He had already figured it out, but hey, if Mello was in denial, who better to shatter his illusions than… himself.

"M-mello! What are you doing in my mother's house? And watch your language! Do you know how rude it is to swear!" Matt stifled a snigger, Mirror-Mello had a personality disorder. Some things just never change.

"No way in Hell! You are not me! Not in a million years! No no no!" Mello was backing toward the wall with an expression of utmost horror and despair on his face. Mirror-Mello had put his now half empty cup down on the table and was looking at them both primly with his hands clasped in front of him, apparently over his fright.

"What on earth are you doing in my mother's house?" Matt was beginning to loose his fight with hilarity.

"You live- with your Mom!" Mello glared at his friend. What had happened to supporting each other through thick and thin?

"Not happening!" Mello moaned.

"There is nothing wrong with supporting one's aged mother. Now how did you two get down here? Muggsy should have stopped you! Muggsy? Muggsy my lovely pooch where are you?" Down the stairs came thumping a tiny brown Chihuahua that could never have stopped anything, barking shrilly. Mirror-Mello promptly picked it up and began cooing over it in baby language. Mello was curled up in the fetal position in a corner, as far from the couch as possible, whimpering. Mirror-Mello seemed to have forgotten that the two intruders were there at all, curling up on the couch.

"Melly? Mello my looooooooove!" A voice screeched down the stairs. Matt promptly lost his grin. If this was Mirror-Mello's basement, and that was Mirror-Mello, that the most likely person to be tromping down the stairs was… Mello rose from his position with a demonic grin as Matt whimpered.

The newest character to enter the surreal scene was Mirror-Matt. If it could be called Matt at all. In all honesty, it looked more like a pink and frilly version of Misa-Misa. Mirror-Matt had kept his hair short, but was apparently a cross dresser with a masochistic streak, if the five inch high heels were anything to go by. He- was it even a he? Matt and Mello had to wonder, had a pink frilly maid dress on with a white apron and bonnet, and was swinging the fluffiest looking purse either of the boys had ever seen.

"I'm a cross dresser?" Matt whispered in morbid fascination. Mello was smirking.

"Yanno, I think I may like Mirror-Matt!"

"Mellllloooooooooo my looooooove! Look at my new shoes! Oh, and Loriel came out with this new lip gloss which of course I bought 'cause I am so totally worth it-" Mirror-Matt continued to blab on about his/her purchases while Mirror-Mello looked on with a sugary sweet smile on his face.

"Any-thing for you snookums!" Matt and Mello turned to look at each other, both pasty white, but Matt with a raised eyebrow.

"I changed my mind. I want nothing to do with that thing. How do we get out of here?"

At that moment, there was a strange buzzing noise and the world went blurry around them fizzing and popping till it settled back into Mello's basement.

There was the black leather couch that was so scuffed and used that it had to be the most comfortable thing on the planet. The air smelled of sex and chocolate, familiar and sweet. The floor's were once again wood, and the walls blood red, tastefully decorated, the giant flat screen resting peacefully in its place of honor. And there, in the middle of the room, was Near. Giant shit-eating grin and all.

"Well, how was it?"

Mello punched him.


End file.
